Mental Health and Comping

Intro note: for those only interested in just the top tips, skip to the bottom. Enjoy!

*tries desperately to remember password*

*resets password*

 *dusts off blog*

Hello, does this thing still work? 

It's been a hot minute since I wrote a blog. In fact, my last blog published on the 27th of September 2018, announced my return to the comping world. Since that is still my last blog, I think we can all assume how that went. Since my last real blog post in July 2017, life has been busy. One university degree, an ED relapse, 2 break ups, 6 house moves, a parents divorce, a dream job, a global pandemic, meeting my incredible boyfriend and lots of other highs and lows in between. 

In short, it's been busy, and my mental health took a battering. As someone with a highly addictive personality, and a bit of a perfectionist, comping became something that I had to do, rather than what I wanted to do. And when I wasn't winning, rather than being able to brush it off, I felt like a failure. Rather than taking hope and celebrating other compers' wins, I felt jealous and compared myself to them. All of a sudden, I realised that comping had gone from being fun, to a source of my anxiety. And so, as the saying goes, when the fun stops, stop.

So, how did I get back to a place where I can enter competitions for fun, enjoy the wins I get and feel genuine pleasure when other compers win (the recent Capital Holiday comp being a great example, Lucky Learners showed the country how to comp!)? In truth, I worked on my mental health. Three things have helped me the most: I have given up alcohol (perhaps temporarily, but at least until I get my anxiety fully under control), I have started therapy and tackled my demons, and I have began to feed the good wolf, rather than the bad one. The parable goes like this: 

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, "My son, the battle is between two "wolves" inside us all.
One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

I have decided to feed joy in others' wins, hope in success, truth in when I need a break, and compassion to myself when I do not win. And so, I have come up with 5 things I am going to do to protect my mental health, all while diving head first into this incredible hobby:

1. Focus on wins: your wins, friends wins and little wins

When you do win, rejoice! Celebrate it! I won a 4-pack of beers as my first win back into comping.        They will be going to my boyfriend, as I am not drinking at the moment, but I sprung out of bed and celebrated like I'd won the lottery!

2. Not winning does not mean you're failing

The fact that the word win in featured so heavily in the comping world, and the antonym is fail, makes it easy for compers to get caught up in their "failures" rather than their wins. However, given compers can enter countless competitions in a day, with perhaps only a 10% success rate, it is important to focus on the wins. If your success rate is 0% (we all have dry spells), try to focus on other people's wins and know that one day they will be celebrating with you! Finding the joy of comping friends will help with that.

3. If your eyes strain, head aches and you want to take a break: take a break

Simple this one. When the fun stops: stop. It's all so tempting to think "just one more", "the next one might be the winner". But in actual fact you cannot prove that the next one will be a winner and you are more likely to just end up with a head ache and a bad nights sleep (said from experience).

4. You don't need to spend all your time on social media. 

Switch up methods if you're avoiding social media: social media has never been great for mental health, so if you need to avoid it, do not think that it is the end of your comping! Yes, there are many competitions on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook, but these are also becoming very popular. Perhaps by trying some gleam comps, or creative comps (to get away from that screen), you will even  increase your wins!

5. Have a natter. 

 Remember that there are real people our there! Chat to other compers on comping Facebook groups. Hearing other compers chat about their lives, their wins and their not-wins (avoiding that F-word), makes them real, rather than a competitor. It helps you to celebrate their wins, rather than being disgruntled that you did not. Groups such as Lucky Learners and Mission Competition (shameless self plug) are a great way to meet other compers. 

So, that's my current 5 aims of being a comper and keeping my head above water. I'll be trying to create a "compers chat" post on  my Mission Competition Facebook group about once a week and celebrating everyone's wins. Please do add your own tips in the comments: I'd love to compile a massive list of ways we can support each other!

Luck and love, 

Lorna